Thank you! May I have another?

If that sent your thoughts in a dirty direction and not in to a culinary one, odds are that you’re already into spanking, whipping, and everything that hurts in the best kind of way. Those of us who’ve already felt and dealt a sexy whipping know how gratifying being on either end can be, but those who haven’t might feel a bit reluctant.


I don’t want to hurt my partner, or I don’t want to get too hurt are common, justified, and absolutely healthy thoughts, but (responsibly) putting them aside is a necessary part of the experience! How do you do it, though? What are the rules? Read on for some do’s and don’ts.

Do

• Find Your Limits
  Before going all out, it’s a good idea to see where and how hard you and your partner like to get hit. Knowing each other’s limits well will help you come up with sexy stuff to do on the fly! Remember to find your limits everywhere, because the same slap on the arse won’t hurt nearly as much as on the face or nipple.
• Start Slow and Ramp Up
  Even after you’re established your limits, don’t start right there. Instead, it’s way sexier to start softly and slowly. Doing so effectively warms you both up and builds up anticipation and arousal. Believe me, going from soft taps to harsh smacks will be WAY sexier than anything else.
• Establish a Safe Word
  I’ve said this pretty much every time kink has come up. Why? It’s THAT important. You never want to put someone else or yourself in a painful, uncomfortable, and truly unpleasant sexual situation. A safe word is your ticket out if things are headed in that direction.

Don’t

• Go Past Your Limits
  Seriously, you don’t want to take anyone out of the moment. Best case scenario, you kill the mood. Worst case, you hurt someone physically or emotionally. Once you have boundaries set, stick to them.
• Ignore Safe Words
  This goes without saying. Always respond immediately to the safe word: all stop.
• Surprise Your Partner
  By this I mean don’t do anything that you haven’t discussed beforehand. For instance, if you’ve never discussed playing with things like clothespins, then don’t use one, or try ANY kinky stuff that you haven’t agreed to, even if it seems tame to you, personally. Responsibility and trust are huge aspects of kink, and you should never violate that.

When all is said and done, getting into whipping play isn’t hard at all! You may think that most of these rules are simply common sense. That’s because they are! The most important part of having any kind of good sex, kinky or not, is knowing what you both want and respecting each other’s wishes and boundaries.

Now that you know what and what not to do, why not start finding the right gear for the job?