There are so many fun-looking sex toys out there that it’s hard to figure out where to start! Variety is wonderful, but too many choices can paralyse. That’s why I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard this kind of question from a less-experienced couple: ‘which toys do we need to get started?’
Luckily, there’s an answer, but it is an open-ended one. I say this constantly, not to sound like a broken record but because it’s the first rule of good sex: it all depends on what you like. Some people are into anal play, some are into BDSM, and there are plenty of other things that turn people on. There’s no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, but if you ask me, here’s what I say are the must-have toys and accessories for inexperienced couples.
A Good Buzz: Couples’ Vibrators
If you think a vibrator is just your lover’s understudy, doomed to perform when your star is unavailable, you’re sorely mistaken; couples’ vibrators are seriously good toys that every couple should have on hand. There’s a variety of different kinds of vibrators for couples, ranging from simple vibrating cock rings to double-headed couples’ vibrators like the remote controlled Lelo Tiani 3.
What makes couples’ vibrators so great is that you both get to enjoy the vibrations. Even though we usually don’t think about it, vibrators feel great to a penis. Don’t know much about vibrators already? Check out our handy guide to vibes for beginners!
Sexy, Safe, and Sane: Kinky Toys for Newbies
The world of bondage is a veritable wonderland of sexual fantasy and exhilarating sex gear. You have everything from handcuffs, rope and gags to nipple clamps, sex swings and ticklers to choose from. The variety can be dizzying, but luckily there are plenty of ways to ease into it. A simple pair of fuzzy handcuffs can go a long way. You can use them to bind ankles and wrists, and can even loop them across a sturdy bed frame to really immobilise yourself or your partner and go to town!
Kink is getting more popular and socially acceptable to talk about these days, and it looks like society at large is getting kinkier. Right now is a wonderful time to start exploring that side of yourself. Just remember, if you plan on doing anything kinky, establish a safe word just in case. That’s a word that always and sincerely means ’stop!’
If You Like It You Shoulda Put a Ring on It: Cock Rings
I mentioned these before when talking about vibrators, but cock rings really deserve their own discussion. On a purely utilitarian level, cock rings help men stay up longer by literally constricting the penis’s spongy tissue, keeping the blood in there and thereby maintaining the erection. I’ll admit, that sounds a lot less sexy than what it really is, but cock rings can really help spice things up.
Not only do cock rings help a man maintain his erection, they can be outfitted with vibrators that stimulate him as much as they do her and come in all shapes and sizes. Some are simple straps, while others have two or three holes that girdle the cock and balls separately—wrapping two places helps keep him up even better by slowing down the flow of cum from the balls to the vas deferens. If anal play is your thing, there are even cock rings that come attached to a butt plug that can be used on either of you! How hot is that?
This might seem to be a lot to take in, but I barely even scratched the surface of couples’ sex toys in this article. However, if you’re just getting started trying out sex toys, you don’t need to invest hundreds or even thousands of dollars into it, nor should you! You can buy a perfectly good set of beginners’ gear for about a hundred or even less, and you can drop serious cash on fancier stuff once you know what you really like. All you have to do is start trying some things out, so what are you waiting for?